Home > Life, School > Shooing the three-toed sloths and the ostriches from the front porch.

Shooing the three-toed sloths and the ostriches from the front porch.

For the bulk of the summer, I have a been a happy little chipmunk, springing out of bed to get at my morning work-outs then moving on to fill my days with reading, writing, friends, and evening training sessions. I was feeling pretty awesome–a rarely felt balance of relaxation and productivity. My “lazy” summer off from school and work didn’t really feel so lazy, since my days seemed to be flying by.

These last two weeks, though, I’ve been dragging. Suddenly my morning work-outs, which once began between 8:30 and 9:30 are starting more around 10:30 or 11. Or, on a day like today, 12:10PM. I’m spending less time skipping around town and more time in my apartment with a pile of DVDs. In summary: I am being lazy.

Coincidentally, my laziness has emerged immediately after my back-to-school anxiety dreams began. In one dream, I turned in all hand-written papers. My professors gave them back immediately, asking with snide disgust, “You know you’re supposed to type these, right?” In another dream, I was living at home again and my parents assured me they would drive me to school. I reluctantly said OK. They puttered around all morning and didn’t take me to school until 11:30, right after my first class has ended. They said, “Oh, it’s not a big deal. It’s just the first class, right?” In a more graphic dream, there were wild horses running around campus, biting students and dragging them around by their limbs. Uh, yeah.

I can only conclude that my anxiety about starting school again is making want to hide my head in the sand. See, I know what’s coming once school starts. It will be mornings up at 6:30 with no slowing down till after midnight. There will be constant deadlines and the pressure to perform. There will be a stressful internship where not every client will create a  success story. And the threat/promise of graduation and the impending job search. There will be the strained attempts to make time for my friends and family and training. Choosing the couch over the bed. Choosing the protein bar over the cooked meal. Choosing coffee over sleep. Right now, I’m choosing laziness over life. I’m acting like that character in Catch-22 who theorizes if he doesn’t do anything, he can slow down the time he has here on Earth. I think I’ve been unconsciously trying to slow down time and fight off the inevitable.

But that’s gotta stop. Being lazy on the occasional Sunday afternoon is wonderful and sometimes necessary, but I can’t hide from school. It’s coming. So instead of seeking in comfort in re-runs of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, I need to rally and seek comfort in the last few weeks of summer, hanging out with my buddies, getting some quality time in with Mr. Latimer, reading books for fun, and all those little things that will soon become a fuzzy memory.

Now I just have to take my dreams and move on. And remember to always type my papers, never let my parents take me to school, and avoid wild horses on campus.





Categories: Life, School
  1. Miles
    August 17, 2011 at 22:58

    Let’s hang out then! We’ll do something non-equestrian.

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